Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central! Watch replays in the live stream playlist!
The Easy Path Project Live Stream #19
Why You Argue Against Success (Instead of Enjoying It)
Good evening! I’m Michael from the Easy Path Project. Tonight, I want to explore a crucial question: Why do we argue against success, especially in dating, instead of enjoying it when it comes?
Are you frustrated with your dating results right now? Sometimes, even a slight change in perspective can unlock new relationship opportunities. Have you ever noticed how listening to advice can feel like an attack? Tonight’s topic will address exactly that: Why do we push back against advice, even when it’s meant to help us?
This show is completely spontaneous and unplanned. Last night, during my 18th live stream, someone named Jack finally stopped lurking and said hello. We had a great conversation, but at one point, Jack said, “I don’t mean to push back,” then listed all the reasons he hadn’t had much luck with women or didn’t expect to. That really struck me as odd. Usually, when guys pay me to help them, they tend to be quiet—they listen, apply what I say, and start seeing real results quickly. This stuff is real and effective, as I’ll explain later.
But it amazed me that someone with dating problems would listen to someone with real success and still push back against the advice offered. Isn’t it curious that people resist help when it’s freely shared?
If you’ve listened to my other live streams, you know that often, the things holding us back are beliefs we’ve picked up along the way. Instead of letting go of limiting beliefs, some of us stubbornly hold onto them, preventing our own progress. If you put these principles to use, your life will improve—there’s simply no way it won’t.
Before we get to the core of tonight’s lesson, let me remind you that I do live streams every night at 7:30, Monday through Friday. We cover practical ways to improve your life, especially in relationships—whether it’s with a partner, friends, family, or colleagues. What we discuss here applies across the board. The magic of the Easy Path Project is that you get all those benefits with minimal effort: we focus on ease, comfort, and simplicity. We’re not about grinding or harsh discipline; this is about creating the life you want the easy way.
If you can’t join my live streams, there’s a playlist linked in the description so you can catch up and start applying these tools.
Tonight’s talk was inspired by last night’s conversation with Jack. I started wondering: Why do men push back when they’re told there are straightforward steps to improvement? All you have to do is listen, evaluate your own situation, and apply what works. It’s that simple.
Here are some reasons guys might push back:
Frustration at Past Failures
If you’ve failed before in dating, that frustration can come out as resistance or arguing. Many guys fixate on a single girl, build her up in their minds, and then feel crushed if it doesn’t work out. They project that disappointment onto future situations, believing every attempt will end the same way.
Or, sometimes, guys haven’t really tried anything at all—they read endlessly online but have never applied what they’ve learned. They become “experts” without practical experience, and that inaction leaves them full of opinions but short on results.
Frustration at a Lack of Success
Not seeing the results you want is painful, and frustration builds. I get it—there were periods in my life filled with knots and self-criticism, perfectionism, and disappointment. That mindset held me back. Sometimes, you just want moral support, not advice. At Easy Path Project, we offer both: moral support and real strategies to improve.
Pushback as a Defensive Response
Advice—even when well-intentioned—can feel like an attack. It might seem like it challenges your intelligence or undermines your efforts, leading to offense and resistance. I often refer to “smart boys,” guys who overthink, who have grown attached to their thoughts and ideas. Remember: Your ideas are just tools. If I offer dating advice, it’s not because I think you’re dumb or lazy. I’m sharing what works.
Pushing Back to Show Standards and Self-Respect
Pushback can be a way of showing you have standards or self-respect. That’s not a bad instinct—defenses protect us. But sometimes, if what you’ve been doing isn’t working, stubbornly defending it just keeps you stuck.
Insecurity, Low Self-Worth, and Seeking Approval
Many men, especially those struggling, are secretly insecure. Low self-worth often shows up as defensiveness. The world can be stingy with compliments for men, which adds to the sense of alienation. Don’t let a lack of recognition make you more defensive or closed off; instead, try to be self-contained and resilient.
Arguing as a Sign of Strength
Some guys think being aggressive, fighting, or arguing shows strength or dominance, especially if they feel they lack power in dating. It took me years to learn that sometimes, sitting still and not reacting is the answer. Pulling back lets things happen more naturally. My first “lightbulb moment” was realizing that not all outcomes need to be forced through aggression.
Holding on to Faulty Maps and Fixed Ideas
If your beliefs about dating are rigid or incorrect, holding onto them just perpetuates poor results. I recall hearing someone argue endlessly with her therapist, defending the very mindset she wanted to change. If you’re not getting good results, don’t fight to keep the habits or beliefs producing those results—be open to change.
Rationalizing Failure and Clinging to Bad Beliefs
Our minds naturally rationalize our behavior and beliefs, even when they’re not working. Some people will argue for the sake of being right, even about things that don’t serve them. Instead, stop giving yourself bad input—evaluate what’s not working, change it, and lighten your load.
Perceiving Advice as Manipulation or Control
Sometimes, people resist because they sense advice is trying to control or manipulate them, even for their benefit. Here’s a quick run-through of the principles I teach—see if any of these sound manipulative to you:
Belief in Self-Worth: See yourself as valuable, with good things to bring to relationships and the world.
Positive Self-Image: Drop negative self-talk; try to see yourself as a winner or, at least, treat yourself neutrally and kindly.
True Self-Expression: Discover who you are, what matters to you, and present yourself authentically.
Lifelong Learning: Always keep growing—don’t stop developing when you leave school or get married. Good relationships require ongoing effort and learning. Be creative in improving yourself and your connections.
Improved Coping and Resilience: When life knocks you down, get back up. My generation never got coddled for minor scrapes—we learned to deal with things and move forward.
Emotional Intelligence: Develop empathy, forgiveness, and an understanding of others and yourself. Don’t hold onto old grudges.
Flexibility: Be willing to adapt if things change or don’t go as planned.
Moral Courage: Stand up for your values, even at personal risk.
Optimism: You don’t have to pretend all is perfect—just stay open to the possibility of good things happening.
These principles aren’t about control; they’re about equipping you to live better.
Suspicion Toward Authority and Trust Issues
Some people distrust anyone offering unsolicited advice, suspecting hidden motives. I understand—I’m deeply skeptical of stuff some people say myself. But I’ve laid out exactly where I’m coming from: my advice stems from wanting to help, not to mislead.
By now, you know my motivation is to foster an “abundant life” mindset. I was inspired by Wallace Wattles’ The Science of Getting Rich, which suggests the universe wants you to live life abundantly. If you prepare yourself, opportunities begin to open. It’s not about religion or dogma—it’s about opening your mind to possibilities.
Self-Reflection: Are You Pushing Back?
Take a moment. Which of these reasons for pushback do you see in yourself? I’ve recognized many within me over the years, but by letting them go, things have improved. If you want to share, please leave a comment—I’d love to know what’s holding you back and how we can move you forward.
The Expert Mindset and Resistance to Change
If you pride yourself on being an independent thinker, you might see advice as an attempt to strip your “expert” status. But if you’re not getting results or you’re seeking advice, don’t let ego stop you from dropping habits that aren’t working.
Sexual Frustration and Relationship Obstacles
A significant source of anger and frustration for men is unmet sexual or emotional needs. It can transform into resistance in discussions about dating. But remember, people have been successfully forming relationships forever—it can happen for you, too. Don’t nurture or protect frustration that’s hurting you.
Arguing to Avoid Vulnerability or Uncomfortable Truths
Arguing helps some people avoid facing uncomfortable truths about themselves—about fear of rejection, fear of women, or vulnerability. Vulnerability isn’t weakness. Women expect men to be human, not perfect. If things don’t go your way, recognize it as universe feedback—simply information to help you improve, not a reflection of your worth.
Taking Advice as an Attack on Identity
When beliefs are tightly intertwined with identity, any challenge can feel like a personal attack. If those beliefs are helping you, keep them. If not, let them go. Don’t take constructive advice as an affront—accept what helps and release what doesn’t.
Habitual Negativity and General Resistance
Arguing for its own sake or being persistently negative is not attractive or productive. You don’t have to be right every time or share your opinion on everything. Sometimes, stepping back, listening, and applying new ideas will improve your life.
Undermining the Coach or Teacher
Some people try to poke holes in advice or undermine the credibility of those helping. But advice should be judged by results. Many men have used my ideas to find relationships or happiness. If others have benefitted, be open to the possibility that you can, too.
Protecting Yourself from Disappointment
Some avoid new advice because trying and failing again is painful. But remember: you didn’t quit learning to walk because you fell a couple of times—neither should you quit trying in other areas of life. Growth and success require continued effort and open-mindedness.
Entrenching Yourself in Unhelpful Beliefs
Sometimes, the more you defend old beliefs, the more stuck you become. Instead, pause and honestly evaluate your situation. What’s working? What’s not? Try something different—none of the principles here will harm you; they’re designed to help you grow.
Building Trust and Community
If I come across as cocky or condescending, I assure you, my goal is to help. I spend time every night sharing these ideas because I genuinely want you to experience the great life you’re capable of. All I ask is that you let go of what’s holding you back and embrace better possibilities.
Projecting Negativity and Limiting Beliefs
If you catch yourself saying new ideas are “unrealistic” or “impossible,” check whether that’s genuinely true or just a product of limiting beliefs picked up along the way. Many of our limitations are learned from our environment—sometimes from parents or authority figures who were themselves imperfect. Recognize where these beliefs come from and consider letting them go.
Moving from Scarcity to Abundance
This is the philosophy at the heart of the Easy Path Project: abundance, growth, positive change. Scarcity and limitation mindsets keep you stuck; growth opens new doors.
If you’re getting value from these streams, please like, comment, and subscribe. Share your experiences—the feedback helps me tailor these talks and, honestly, I learn from you, too.
Final Thoughts: Let Go and Grow
Let go of outdated ideas holding you back. Just for a moment, imagine I’m the universe’s messenger—a voice telling you that your limiting beliefs have run their course. The relationships and life you dream of are possible. Once you let go of the baggage and become your best self, opportunities will start to appear. That’s the power of an abundance mindset.
If you’ve had setbacks before, don’t worry; there is a silver lining. Stick around—we’re just getting started.
I do these live streams Monday through Friday at 7:30 p.m. Central. If you can’t join me live, catch up on my channel playlist. Thank you for hanging out with me tonight. I hope you learned something valuable. Until next time—take it easy! Thank you for hanging out with me tonight. I hope you learned something valuable. Until next time—take it easy!
Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central!
Watch replays in the live stream playlist!
The Easy Path Project Live Stream #10
What If Everything You Believe About Your Self-Worth Is Wrong?
Hello and welcome to the Easy Path Project live stream. Tonight we’re talking about what if everything you believe about your self-worth is wrong.
A lot of the problems that most people have in general with themselves, especially in the context of personal development, stem from thinking there’s an issue you can address. For instance, if you think you’re deficient in some aspect of confidence and you want to build your confidence, you might think you’ve got to do something to build it. But what you’ll find is that regardless of what you do, if you don’t address the underlying root issues of your problem, you’re going to have a lot of difficulty overcoming it.
It’s probably easier overall to start removing the crap that’s making you think or feel that way. That’s what we’re going to talk about tonight.
Over the last few nights I’ve been talking about basic introspection – the things you have to do to know where you stand, why you stand, what you stand for, how to evaluate them, and how to use this evaluation to develop a plan to start solving it.
Instead of telling you tonight about how great things are going to be once you start digging into the things that might be causing some of your underlying issues, we’re actually going to go down a list of possible reasons why you might feel like you’re not good enough.
It’s a really crummy place to be, but it’s also a really great place to grow from. As you start to grow, you’ll see that the way you perceived yourself in the past is really not correct. Once that realization takes hold in your mind, you’ll understand that you’ve been holding yourself back. It’s not that you haven’t been enough to deal with the situations you’re putting yourself into – it’s that you are actively working against yourself.
Understanding Self-Doubt
Self-doubt often stems from past experiences where we felt judged or inadequate. Many things we’re dealing with as younger adults or even older adults are things that happened to us when we were young, and for whatever reason, long beyond their expiration date, we’re still hanging onto them.
Some of these things might have been appropriate at the time or maybe they weren’t, but you don’t have to keep hanging onto them. They might have been good for that time or they might not have been good, or they might have been incorrect. Some of the internal dialogue you have might be conveying incorrect information or outdated information.
We’re going to discuss how to dislodge these crappy things that are stuck to you like barnacles and let you start to get a little bit more free. Let you feel good, put your shoulders back, relax – that’s where we want to be.
Social Conditioning and Value
Social conditioning can discourage us from acknowledging our own value. A lot of times, the things going around us – we react to them. There’s the possibility that they may be wrong or misguided, or that we might be wrong or misguided. There are a whole bunch of aspects to it.
Think of society trying to tell you, “Hey, this is how you got to be because these are the things we have established that you need to deal with.” Maybe not. Maybe I can be polite and play along to a point, but otherwise, no thanks. I’m going to march to my own drummer.
The Growth Mindset
One of the really fun things we’re going to get to at the tail end of this discussion is that your growth mindset allows abilities to improve rather than remain fixed. These things we talk about tonight and some of the things we uncover – it’s not going to be a situation where you’re doomed to suffer this forever. If you’ve got a growth mindset, you’re going to be able to overcome, adapt, improve, and advance.
For the last two weeks I’ve been talking about the theory behind the Easy Path Project, and tonight we’re taking the first step down the road. This is where you start thinking – seriously, that’s all this takes. You ruminate, indulge a little mental fantasy, and start to think about these things. Think about how easy it’s going to be once you’ve identified these things.
Any of these things we talk about tonight – there’s probably somebody on the internet who is either talking about how to fix it right now or has fixed it and will tell you how they fixed it. All of these things are just tests to see what you’re made of. If you’ve got the idea that you’re going to be a superior man, then these are little baby steps tests. You’ll start building up a trail of success starting from the easiest point and just go from there.
This does get to be a lot of fun once you allow yourself to quit carrying all that crap that is unpleasant at best and unnecessary. Just stop it.
20 Questions to Challenge Your Self-Worth Beliefs
Let’s go through these questions as a thought experiment. If any of these sound like situations you’re having to deal with, think about how you can start working on eradicating those issues and improving as a person.
1. Past Experiences
Have you been in situations where you felt judged or inadequate before?
Just the nature of children and how their brains work – they take these situations where a child by their very nature needs to be corrected sometimes or pushed in certain directions. If you’re not gently pushed in that direction, sometimes it could be a little harsh, and you can maybe take the wrong lesson away or it’ll stick more persistently than you had hoped.
Start thinking about what those things are that you considered to be traumas. One of the little mind things I do on a daily basis is step back and look at things in front of me so I can understand the totality. Once you’re able to step back and say, “Okay, I felt bad because this happened or I feel like I have diminished self-worth because of this other thing that happened,” you’re not feeling it inside you – you’re seeing it. Once it’s one step removed, it’s going to be easier to deal with because it’s not you. It’s something that’s on you, and once you decide to get it off you, that’s when things start to improve.
On Forgiveness
One of the things that’s going to be a common theme with the Easy Path Project is forgiveness. As a child, you’re thinking about your parents being whatever age they are, thinking they’re adults, somehow elevated above you, that they know everything. But once you get to a certain age, you think, “My parents were still just children or just slightly past being children and they had me.” I don’t believe they received a handbook on the knowledge of the universe to raise me properly.
You’ve got kids who were raised probably incorrectly, then they have kids and raise those kids sort of incorrectly, and it just goes on and on. Sometimes your parents – they’re still learning and they still make mistakes, just like every person makes mistakes. Even if they were kind of shitty to you, if you can find it in your heart to start forgiving, don’t hang onto those past hurts or anger. That stuff is all gone and it really doesn’t matter.
You might have had situations in the past where you were embarrassed – maybe you were supposed to give a speech on President’s Day and you messed up and someone laughed at you. That kind of crap stings, but you’re probably the only one that still remembers that. Once you drop that, it’s gone.
Don’t let past experiences dictate today because they don’t exist except in your memories, so they’re really not real.
2. Comparisons
Do you immediately assess others’ strengths and assume you fall short?
If you walk into a room and see somebody and say, “Well that guy is better than me,” that’s a self-esteem and self-worth issue. If all you can do is see him, what is it that makes you think that? Why do you have such low self-esteem that you just instantly consider yourself inferior?
Once you start feeling better about yourself, once you start developing your confidence and authenticity, it’ll help you stand up as a person. Once you feel good about yourself – put your shoulders back, your head up, your nose up a little bit even – just start to feel what it’s like to feel good about yourself. Then understand that you don’t compare unfavorably to other people.
3. Self-Perception
Are you overly critical of yourself without seeing your true value?
You’re misperceiving the situation if you think it was a bad day because one, two, or three things went bad out of a million. It’s the same thing if you have a problem with being an introvert – you put excessive value on being an introvert and it overshadows all the other good things about you. That’s wrong.
Once you get an even understanding of how you compare to others, you don’t necessarily have to be critical of yourself in the sense of beating yourself up. You can recognize that you have an issue and need to deal with it, but don’t let that thing overwhelm your understanding that overall, you’re a pretty cool cat who just needs to sand off the rough edges.
4. Fear of Rejection
Does the worry of not fitting in make you doubt yourself?
I don’t have a fear of rejection. I don’t worry about how I fit in or don’t fit in. I’m Michael. Sometimes I have trouble holding my ego together. What was it that Rorschach said from the Watchmen? “It’s not that I’m in here with you, it’s that you’re in there with me.”
If you start feeling good about yourself and start allowing yourself to be yourself, then that won’t be an issue anymore. Find out why you feel that you’re not going to fit in, what the root causes are, and then address those.
5. Social Conditioning
Have you been taught to downplay your achievements or worth?
Think about NFL football from 10 or 15 years ago. When you scored a touchdown, it was supposed to be a very muted celebration – maybe spike the ball, maybe point at the stands, but pretty calm. Nowadays, they have the entire team doing little performing monkey routines, which is kind of ridiculous, but it shows how things have changed.
In the past, you might have been taught that you had to hold it together when you accomplished something – got a good grade on a test, did something well at work, won a trophy in a sporting competition. But nowadays, the world is a little more open to celebration after winning or scoring. You don’t have to hold it together like a black hole – you can sort of let your freak flag fly.
People give a lot of crap to The Big Bang Theory, saying it was making fun of nerds, but what it did was expose those types of people who can just be into something because they’re into it and couldn’t care less about what anybody else said. As a result, people understand that people are on the spectrum and might have issues with being introverts or outcasts or not fitting in, but this show gave people an idea that these people exist, and that’s okay.
Don’t get bent out of shape if you’ve been taught something in the past about how to think about how you fit in. You’re an adult – you can do adult things now, as long as you hold it together a little bit and don’t go too crazy.
6. Perfectionism
Do you feel like you have to be flawless to be accepted?
Nobody is perfect. When I started these live streams, I put it off about six weeks longer than I had expected because I wanted to get all my lessons just so, all my slides just so, my video setup just so – I wanted to get it all perfect. Here I am, finding myself 10 live streams in, and none of the plans I had for the themes or content is turning out to be what I expected.
I wanted to make it perfect, and once I got moving, I found out that I was trying to perfect something that didn’t need to be perfected. I just needed to start moving.
In situations where you feel that you’ve got to be perfect, flawless, funny, good-looking, on point on everything – no. Try to put some effort into it if you think it’ll benefit you and go from there, but don’t let it slow you down or stop you. I’m just six weeks behind now, and all that work to be perfect got me nowhere.
If you want to go out into the world and live this different life you’re aiming towards, don’t wait until you get perfect and then go out. Go out and work in the world as you become perfect.
7. Impostor Syndrome
Do you feel like you don’t deserve to be in certain spaces?
Impostor syndrome is an internalized fear of being a fraud despite your competence and success. A lot of people think they have to be perfect. Even though they’ve done hard work and been promoted into a situation or done well in a class, they sit there and have these nagging doubts like, “Am I really supposed to be here?”
There’s the possibility that things could go south, but deal with it. What if it doesn’t go south? What if it goes awesome? That’s a possibility too. We just discussed that you are competent and successful, so why would you have the impression that something’s going to go bad? It’s just as likely, or actually even more likely, it’s going to go good.
8. Body Language and Self-Presentation
Does your posture or expression reinforce insecurity?
Girls are not turned on by guys with slouched shoulders and bent-over necks who look at their phone all day and are trying to minimize themselves and hide. The reason that Chad and Tyrone and the alpha male do as well as they do is because they present themselves differently. They stand up tall, stand up straight, pull their head back, look around, make eye contact.
If you have trouble doing those things, first figure out why. It’s not that big of a deal to start improving your posture. There are simple exercises – as simple as standing up against a wall and putting your hands up and your shoulders up against the wall to improve your posture. Just the way you walk, or if you wear scrungy clothes, wear something a little bit nicer.
That little tiny input will achieve fantastic results. They might be small at the beginning, but they get better and they’re cumulative. Once you go out and people start reacting to you because you’re presenting yourself differently – standing up straight, dressing well, maybe you went to the gym and got a little better body so you’re feeling kind of swaggy – that’s going to pay off a lot. It’s not hard.
That’s therapeutic too. Lifting heavy weights – if you do have residual anger from any of these things we’re talking about, work them out with the iron. Take it out in the gym. You’ll feel better, I promise.
9. Inner Dialogue
What kinds of thoughts run through your mind in those moments?
A lot of people’s self-talk, their inner dialogue, is crap. They’re always saying, “I’m not this, I’m not that, I can’t do this, I shouldn’t do this.” Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.
I don’t understand why that has to exist. Maybe it’s self-preservation – you’re protecting yourself or something. But if you’re constantly talking down to yourself or allowing poor thinking to dissuade you from doing or trying things, it’s actually doing you a disservice. Stop it.
Find out why these things are saying it. A lot of times when I’m dealing with stuff like this, I try to change the way I say it to myself. Instead of “I was lazy,” I say, “I was lazy, but now I’m productive” or “I’m on my way to being productive” or “I will be productive” or “I should be productive in the future if I’m doing these steps.”
Just a little change in the way you speak to yourself helps. One of the things I’ve discussed about NLP is something Tony Robbins used to use a lot called a pattern interrupt. If you have a cat and it wants to jump up on the counter, you stand there with a water bottle, and each time the cat jumps up, you spray it. You interrupt its pattern. Now its new pattern is jumping up, getting sprayed with water, and jumping down.
If you’re talking down to yourself or saying bad things to yourself or entertaining poor thinking, stop. Use a pattern interrupt consciously. Once you start to pull back and see your thoughts going through your mind, it won’t be something happening to you – it’s something that’s happening, and then you decide how you’re going to deal with that.
That slight disassociation helps. I talk about thinking about life sort of as a game or simulation because it allows you to step back and say, “Okay, well…” It’s like those first-person shooter games where you can see the guy – you’re not the guy shooting, you can see the guy. That’s the perspective you want to back up to. You’ll see the world happening to this guy, and you don’t necessarily have to think about internal dialogue or things that are working on you. It’s more like there’s this guy here and there’s this stuff here, and they don’t have to…
I wish I could explain that better, but hopefully you’re smart guys and you’re digging what I’m getting at. Just change the way you think and don’t allow yourself to think poor thoughts. Just stop.
10. Unrealistic Standards
Are you holding yourself to standards no one else expects you to meet?
Sometimes we just discussed perfectionism. Nobody’s perfect. Everybody’s stumbling down this path just like you are, so don’t hold that against yourself. If you’re not graceful like a swan or you don’t look like Fred Astaire dancing, you can look kind of clumsy like that guy from Digital Underground in “The Humpty Dance” – that’s an old hip-hop song you ought to check out. It’s kind of funny.
He talks about his dance where it seems like he’s got broken legs, so it’s kind of clumsy and ridiculous looking, but he’s like, “Well, I don’t care because I’m on the dance floor and I’m having a good time.”
Just think about your life like that. I don’t have to be perfect, but I’m in this life and I’ve got this opportunity to have a good time, so hey, let’s have a good time.
11. Validation Seeking
Do you feel like you need external approval to confirm your worth?
Once again, low self-esteem and low self-worth – the idea that you need to earn somebody’s approval or affection or praise. Dr. Robert Glover in the book “No More Mr. Nice Guy” talks about this. A nice guy would be a guy who does all these things upfront before he ever has the opportunity to form a relationship with a girl, in the hopes that if he gives her enough or does enough stuff, he can earn her affection or get a relationship. No, no, no, no, no.
Do you have that nice guy syndrome? Do you feel that you’ve got to earn people’s respect or acceptance or attention? If you’re having to be a performing monkey, it’s not manly. When we talk about alphas or sigmas or Chads or Tyrones, they’re not going, “Here baby, I brought you flowers or I’ll take you to some super nice place for dinner, now give me love.” That’s not how it happens.
Don’t go down that path. If you feel that you need to do something to get something back from somebody else, figure out why that is and then move away from that idea.
12. Strengths versus Weaknesses
Are you focusing more on what you lack rather than what you bring?
This refers back to the point I made earlier. You have everything go right in your day except for one or two things, then you say it was a bad day because those one or two things went bad. It’s also the situation where you have a situation where you can’t approach a girl or can’t feel confident in a situation, and you allow that one aspect of your personality or situation to cause you to think that you’re doomed. That’s overblowing the situation.
If you actually sit down with a piece of paper and draw a line – on the left side put your strengths and on the right side put your weaknesses – if you were being honest, your strengths would be a lot longer list of items. That should give you the confidence that you’ve got this tiny little list of things that are holding you back. Now that you’re thinking about it, now that you’ve got them right here on this piece of paper, you can identify them and start to eradicate them, start to feel better.
13. Cultural Influences
How do societal or family expectations shape your confidence?
Sometimes parents or culture shapes who you are, and sometimes you have to kind of learn how to navigate within those societies or families. If you want to be a fine upstanding member of that community, sometimes you got to play the game, and you got to reconcile playing the game and being who you want to be.
You got to thread that needle, but the idea is that your personal growth and mental health comes first. Sometimes it could be a situation where you just have to pull back from the things that are holding you back. If it’s family or culture that’s holding you back, identify that and then take steps to fix it. Hopefully you can hold it all together, but if not, sometimes you need to move on or alter the conditions you’re living in.
That’s a tough one and I don’t have personal experience with that, but for example, one gentleman who came to me to learn how to get a wife had come from a religious background that severely limited interaction between males and females. They almost had to be chaperoned when they were together. He was in his 50s and had finally made up his mind to get beyond that, but he had to leave. Once he did that, the next step was to remove the conditioning.
14. Fear of Being Judged
Do you assume others are scrutinizing you when they might not be?
You have to understand that other people are more like you than not. They might have characteristics that are different, but the underlying machinery of humanity is pretty similar. If a girl you’re interested in has a couple of considerations and things you’re concerned about that you think are really reasonable to hold you back, she might have the same things.
That’s going to be a discussion we have coming up fairly soon about the considerations that women have about even getting into a relationship with a guy. There are probably 20 or 30 reasons why, regardless of who or what you are – you might be Chad or Tyrone, but if she’s not able to reconcile these other things, it doesn’t matter who you are.
One of those things that’s a problem for women is that they might also have fear of being judged or being held up to a certain standard. She might be dealing with the same internal crisis that you are, just from the feminine perspective.
Don’t be thinking that if a girl or anybody in any situation is judging you or thinking about you, because it’s just as likely that they’re thinking about their own stuff and grinding on the crap that’s holding them back because they haven’t gotten to the point yet where they’re going to fix it.
Don’t assume that everybody’s looking at you and thinking about you and judging you. Most people, if they notice you at all, have 27 things they got to think about in their head at any given time, plus their cell phone, plus they got their face stuck in Instagram. People are oblivious. You could be invisible if you want, or you can start on this little path to making yourself feel better and start to become uninvisible.
15. Previous Failures
Are you letting past mistakes define your present self-worth?
You were younger and stupider – cut yourself some slack. If you have a situation where you made a mistake or something didn’t go like you planned, you evaluate what happened, make a new plan or have a new idea of how things are going to go forward, and move forward. You don’t hold onto that crap from the past because it’s not real. It doesn’t exist except in your mind.
Think about hypnotism or even some forms of therapy where they’re actually able to attenuate the value of things in your head. You can do that for yourself. Once you decide to stop carrying that crap, then it’ll no longer burden you.
16. Social Anxiety
Could underlying anxiety be fueling these thoughts?
All of these things probably have some underlying issue. If you’re anxious or feeling insecure, you’re going to have to address it. By identifying it – “Hey, I’ve got this situation, I’m anxious because of this or I feel this way because of that” – you can start addressing the root causes.
17. Expectation versus Reality
Are you imagining worst-case scenarios that may never happen?
This comes up with me surprisingly often. Mark Twain, the writer, made the comment, “I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which have never happened.” You sit there and let your mind just start running, imagining all these situations. If you’re coming from a place where you’re allowing yourself to have poor thinking, you’re naturally going to be coming at it from a negative standpoint, so you’ll find that you’re imagining the worst-case scenario.
We’ve already established that most things go well, most things happen like they’re supposed to. Some things go kind of crummy, some things could be better – okay, well, let’s work on those things. It’s not like we have to work on the 97% of things that work absolutely flawlessly like a Swiss watch every single day of our lives. It’s these little teeny tiny things that are so isolated, it’ll be very easy for us to address them. It’s not hard.
The very first step is just understanding that they exist and that you’re bringing them to mind.
18. Hidden Assumptions
Are you assuming others are inherently more capable or confident?
If you’re coming from a standpoint of negativity, then it’s natural that you would diminish who or what you are, but that’s not necessarily true. You might be a person who’s very confident – we discussed it earlier. You’re competent and you’re successful. If you’re competent and successful at these things, why would you think that someone else is more competent than you or more capable than you, more confident or more capable?
It’s not the case. Once again, it all starts at the bottom – find out why you feel that way.
Every single night this week I’ve discussed the whole math channel on YouTube. He realized that the very first thing he could move forward on and the easiest was his body. He hit the gym and built himself up to having a smoking hot body and started getting girls that would never have even noticed him in the past. He was able to have relationships with them. His mindset changed simply because he took care of some limitations, some stuff that had been holding him back.
Once you start getting rid of those things, you’ll find that whereas in the past you might have felt that others are more capable or more confident, that’s really not the case, and you just move forward from there.
19. Self-Compassion
Are you offering yourself the kindness you would give a friend?
I’ve talked about this lots lately too. People beat ourselves up – we expect ourselves to be perfect or to get everything right and do it well and optimally. You don’t hold your friends to those same standards. If your buddy made a mistake on a test, you wouldn’t call him an idiot. You’d never in a million years do that unless you were absolutely off the rails.
So why would you do it to yourself? “Yeah, okay, well I realize I didn’t study enough or I didn’t study correctly. I made this mistake, but it’s just because I wasn’t prepared. It was not a character flaw that I made the mistake – it’s just that something went wrong.”
Seriously, cut yourself some slack. You don’t have to be perfect. Nobody expects you to be perfect. Let’s just settle for improving right now – that you’re getting better and feeling better.
20. Growth Mindset
Do you see confidence as something that can be developed rather than something you’re born with?
As I mentioned in one of the very first slides, your growth mindset allows abilities to improve rather than remain fixed. As long as you hold onto the option of things getting better, then there is the option of things getting better. Just having your mind open to the possibility and orienting yourself towards growth is key.
All of this is just a situation where as you’ve gone through your life, you’ve had to deal with these things. Sometimes you either didn’t deal with them correctly or you’re still dealing with them. Some of the stuff is just outdated. Evaluate what works for you or what is important to you – what really matters.
If you’re using the growth mindset lens and you can see, “Okay, well, I had these situations to deal with in the past, but I have the ability now to move forward beyond them and kind of leave them in the past.”
I have something I’m saving for when I’m old and gray on my deathbed to remind me of something I had to deal with, and I’m going to see how I’m going to fix it. I’ve got this point out in the future where I’m going to be able to look back. I’m going to reach this place where I feel really good, and then I can look back and say, “Okay, well, this is what I had to go through to get there.”
If anything, it’s going to make you feel better. You’re going to feel awesome that you were so much stronger than you ever imagined and that you’re able to recover from what was holding you back and really strive. It’s going to be fun. It’s not really hard either. It takes some introspection, it takes going through lists like this and seeing how you can apply the ideas, but once you recognize them, it’s going to be a lot easier.
Final Thoughts
Confidence is not about being perfect – it’s about showing up as your authentic self. Your authentic self is the person who you are when you’re born, and those things that are piling up on you – the disappointments, the anger, the hurts, all that kind of stuff – it’s just trash that you got to take out. It’s like sweeping up a dusty cabin – you just got to get rid of all that trash, and then you’ll have a nice cabin.
That’s where we’re headed here. You’re an awesome person carrying around a bunch of crap that is not useful and is not helpful, and it’s got to go. So start taking out the trash.
I do have live streams Monday through Friday around 7:30 PM Central, so definitely show up, hang out, take part. Feel free to say hi, tell me what you’re thinking, tell me what you want to think about, what you want to talk about. Let’s do it. Also, watch the replays in the live stream playlist – I’ve got those there with a lot of interesting information and helpful stuff to get you started.
Thanks for hanging out tonight. Hopefully you’re finding some of this stuff to be useful and you can start to apply it over the weekend and start feeling better. It’s cumulative – you start feeling better, do a little bit more, you feel a little bit better, and suddenly you’re feeling pretty groovy. It gets momentum and just gets better from there.
I’ll show up Monday night, and I think the plan right now is to maybe do another one of these with another couple of ideas – why you might be holding yourself back or things that might need to go, and we can help you identify them.
Thank you for hanging out tonight, and we’ll see you Monday night. Take it easy.
Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central!
Watch replays in the live stream playlist!
The Easy Path Project Live Streams #18
What If Everything You Thought You Knew About Her Dating Struggles Was Only Half the Story?
Good evening! This is Michael from the Easy Path Project. Welcome to another White Knight Wednesday live stream. Tonight, we’re diving into a subject that many of you might not have considered: “What if everything you thought you knew about women’s dating struggles was only half the story?”
Somewhere along the way, I realized that women, just like men, are human beings. They have dreams, hopes, desires, needs, and face both external and internal pressures. It makes sense to try and understand them—not only to help yourself in dating, but also to support women in navigating their own challenges.
Oddly, I’ve gotten some pushback from guys who think it’s unmanly to try to understand women. But instead of backing down, I want to celebrate this perspective. Tonight, I’m leaning into it.
It’s White Knight Wednesday, and we’re going to talk about the very real dating problems women face. I’ll cover about 20 different points—things you need to be aware of if you want to form meaningful relationships.
Let’s jump in.
High Expectations & Social Media Distortions
Women today face high expectations, often fueled by social media, which can distort real-world dating experiences. Unlike earlier generations, young women now see constant streams of curated, filtered content, making it seem like everyone else’s relationships are perfect. This disconnect can make it harder to appreciate authentic connections and cause women to feel like they’re not measuring up.
Another issue is the rise of hookup culture. It’s created an environment where meaningful relationships struggle to thrive. Peer pressure, both for men and women, means people sometimes do things they’re uncomfortable with just to fit in. The result? Lots of shallow connections and fewer opportunities for real relationships to grow.
Pressures from Society and Biology
On top of these cultural shifts, women are under pressure from friends, family, and society—plus their own biological clocks. While technology offers possibilities like having children later in life, biology doesn’t always cooperate.
By their late 30s, a woman’s window for having children is often closing. From early adulthood onward, women face questions from those around them (“When are you getting married? When will you have kids?”), on top of the internal pressure from their own bodies. It’s a complex tension you rarely hear discussed openly.
The Live Stream Community
Before we go further, let me remind you that this is a live stream. If you’re out there lurking, chime in! Let’s get some conversations going so we can all learn and teach one another, together.
I love discussing women and relationships, because women genuinely enrich life if you take the time to understand and accommodate them.
I stream Monday through Friday at 7:30 p.m. Central and also have a playlist of past live streams, which I encourage you to check out if you want to catch up or rewatch for more insights.
Dating Problems Women Face
Let’s break down some specific dating struggles women encounter.
Unrealistic Expectations
Women are frequently pressured by societal standards and social media portrayals of ‘perfect’ relationships. These curated, edited lives are often inaccurate or inauthentic, yet they set a standard that’s impossible to live up to. The average person ends up feeling like they’re missing out or somehow inadequate.
Dating apps amplify this problem. Even women who might not have received much attention before suddenly get flooded with messages and ‘matches.’ This influx of attention can mess with their self-esteem and create unrealistic ideas about who they can genuinely connect with. Sometimes, a brief fling with someone “out of their league” can leave a lasting impression, making it hard to find satisfaction in future relationships.
Fear of Rejection
Many people think dating is easy for women, but that’s not always true. Women face the same anxieties and fear of rejection as men do. Often, women who are considered average try to date guys ‘above their league.’ When things don’t work out, it hits their self-confidence hard, leaving them feeling unworthy. If they dated someone more at their own level, they might feel more comfortable, but social expectations push them higher—fueling doubt and discomfort.
Lack of Confidence and Self-Esteem
Low confidence can make it hard for women to approach potential partners or feel worthy of love, just as it can for men. The path forward isn’t about thinking you’re a superhero; it’s about getting back to a sense of evenness and self-acceptance.
Balancing Career and Personal Life
Today’s women are often juggling career aspirations, personal lives, travel, hobbies, friends, and dating. For many, relationships don’t crack the top priorities until later in life. But by then, building a deep connection is harder. Many men aren’t interested in their career achievements—they value different qualities in a partner.
Trust Issues
Bad experiences—whether from previous relationships or from trying to “date up”—can result in trust issues. Social influences, like advice from friends or viral videos, make matters worse. If a woman is told she must find a man who is six feet tall, makes six figures, and so on, but those relationships don’t work out, it can be tough for her to trust guys who don’t fit that mold.
Communication Barriers
Communication differences between men and women are real and significant. When a woman shares a problem, she often seeks empathy, not a solution—whereas men are often quick to fix things. Effective relationships require learning to express your feelings and needs, and to truly listen.
Pressure to Settle Down
Society expects women to balance everything—to have a career, a family, education, and fun. But these competing pressures—along with the biological reality—can be overwhelming.
Challenges Finding Genuine Connections
Dating apps are superficial and often curated, making genuine connections rare. Meeting people in real life, with all the nuanced cues and chemistry, usually leads to more meaningful interactions.
Coping with Ghosting
The phenomenon of “ghosting”—where someone suddenly cuts off all communication—is common. It’s easier to just disappear online than to face uncomfortable conversations. For both men and women, being ghosted deeply hurts and can erode trust.
Navigating Modern Dating Norms
Hookup culture has changed expectations. Intimate acts that were once reserved for committed relationships are now sometimes seen as just part of ‘a good night out.’ Young people, lacking firm boundaries or role models, can feel pressured into situations they’re not comfortable with.
Compatibility and Attracting the Right Partner
It’s not just about appearances or superficial qualities; it’s about aligning values and life goals. Presenting yourself honestly and developing those values makes it much easier to attract and maintain the right relationships.
Navigating Insecurity and Mindset
I’ve spent a lot of time helping men—especially older or less experienced guys—with dating. Many internalize rejection and turn it into evidence that they’re not worthy. If this sounds familiar, remember: mindset is everything. Start to believe in possibility, and the way you carry yourself will change. Confidence comes from treating yourself with respect and letting go of old baggage.
Vulnerability and Gender Expectations
Men and women are held to different societal standards for vulnerability. While women might be comforted in their insecurity, men are often expected to ‘man up.’ This isn’t fair, but it’s the reality. You can be vulnerable, but work on owning your insecurity and striving to improve rather than letting it control you. Find what’s holding you back, and start letting it go.
Female Dating Concerns – Image, Trust, Priorities
Body Image
Many women struggle with body image, which affects self-esteem. Something as simple as eye contact from a confident person can rattle someone who feels unattractive. These insecurities can keep women from seeking out new relationships.
Infidelity and Trust
Dealing with infidelity—or the fear of it—can create lasting trust issues, especially when dating partners considered “out of their league.” The prevalence of shallow connections via apps worsens the problem.
Long-Distance and Financial Pressures
Sometimes, it’s as simple as distance or finances that keep people apart. If someone can’t provide financial stability, it can jeopardize a woman’s desire for a family. Similarly, if a woman has high debt, some men may hesitate to make a relationship serious.
Family, Friends, and Social Interference
Women are more social creatures than men and rely heavily on their social circles for support and validation. If friends or family don’t approve of a partner, it can sabotage the relationship—even if it’s a great match.
Mental Health Issues
Mental health—anxiety, depression, or the use of psychiatric medications—impacts more than 1 in 5 women. This can make dating and relationships even more challenging. It’s important to know what you’re getting into, and sometimes, for your own wellbeing, you need to move on.
Time Constraints
Many women lack time for dating or relationships because they prioritize career, hobbies, travel, or other commitments higher than partnership. The same goes for career-driven men.
Putting It Into Practice
This blog post has covered a lot of ground tonight. Understanding women’s dating struggles makes you a more empathetic and appealing partner. You don’t need to get everything right overnight. Start with small steps—working on your self-esteem, presentation, and communication skills. Practice meeting people. Don’t take rejection personally. See each experience as an opportunity to learn and grow.
If you’ve found this helpful, leave a comment or share it with a friend. I host live streams Monday through Friday at 7:30 p.m. Central, and all past episodes are available in a playlist. My goal is to build a supportive community where we help each other become better—both for ourselves and for the people we want to have in our lives.
Thanks for reading, and remember—women deal with their own set of struggles, just like men. If you appreciate that, and approach relationships with empathy and open-mindedness, you’re already ahead of the game. Looking forward to seeing you in the next live stream!
Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central!
Watch replays in the live stream playlist!
The Easy Path Project Live Stream #09
Strong Inner Game Outcomes: Pt 3 Flexibility & True Self-Expression
Good evening, and welcome to the Easy Path Project live stream with me, Michael. Tonight, I want to talk about a topic I find really exciting: what doors open when you align with your true self? The focus is on authenticity, self-worth, self-confidence, and the assurance that comes from understanding who you are and why you are the way you are.
The Power of Core Values
Take some time to reflect on your core values—the fundamental things that truly matter to you. Once you identify these, you can gently but firmly insist that others respect them. When you give yourself a bit of structure, you’ll find that personal growth becomes much easier. You must become a pillar for yourself, strong enough to say what you mean, mean what you say, and expect respect—not necessarily understanding—from those around you.
Many people are wishy-washy, simply going along with whatever is popular or socially accepted, even if it doesn’t feel true to them inside. Humanity often collectively believes things that aren’t true, and people pretend to agree because it’s what everyone else does. If you don’t believe something, it’s important to stand up and say it.
Remember the Hans Christian Andersen story “The Emperor’s New Clothes”? The little child in the story calls out the truth when everyone else pretends otherwise. Honesty is vital. You can be honest and also tactful. Being honest does not mean being rude. Once you feel secure in who you are, standing up for yourself gets easier each time, and you build confidence from these experiences.
What Happens When You Align with Your True Self?
Tonight, we’re covering themes including flexibility, resilience, and self-expression. When you align with your true self, you boost your confidence. I want you to realize that the journey isn’t about turning from bad to good—it’s about uncovering your goodness and letting go of the bad habits or negative self-talk you’ve picked up along the way. It’s a profound but subtle shift.
Building Flexibility and a Resilient Mindset
Flexibility enables you to embrace change. For example, when I was teaching older men to improve their dating skills, I noticed some would rely on scripts rather than developing their social skills. Memorizing lines only works until the conversation takes an unexpected turn.
If you do the work to understand yourself, clean up your insecurities, and recognize your value, you’ll find that off-script moments don’t throw you off. You’ll be comfortable responding authentically and skillfully adjusting to the situation.
Mike Tyson once said, “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.” You can plan, but you need adaptability when things don’t go as expected. Authentic self-expression means you’re more confident interacting with others because you’re grounded in your values.
Developing Authenticity and Self-Expression
Once you define your core values, express them with confidence. You don’t need to broadcast them loudly; simply embodying them is enough. Building an internal framework helps you feel secure, and with each step, your confidence grows naturally.
Today, I listened to a discussion on the Healthy Gamer GG YouTube channel—the speaker helps people improve their communication and dating lives. The message was clear: none of the personal development concepts you’re hearing tonight are difficult. You’re not becoming good from bad; instead, you’re good already, and the process is about letting go of negative baggage and growing from there. Take one simple step at a time, and exponential growth follows.
Reducing Inner Conflict for Joy and Fulfillment
Many people adopt the consensus view, failing to honor their authentic selves. This lack of congruence creates inner conflict. When your external actions and internal beliefs don’t align, you feel torn, indecisive, or uncomfortable.
Reducing this inner conflict paves the way for joy. If you’re clear about your values, you no longer worry about how to respond in uncomfortable situations. You simply do what is congruent with your authentic self, which brings fulfillment.
The Easy Path Project Live Streams
This community is designed to support your journey. I hold these live streams every weeknight around 7:30 p.m. Central. Right now, much of what I’m doing is practicing and training YouTube on the channel’s purpose, but I’m excited for the time when we begin having deeper conversations as a community. You’re invited to join in, chat, and share your thoughts.
I’ve created a playlist so you can catch up on past live streams. Today’s program is part three, so you can revisit previous nights to get a better understanding of how to apply these principles to your life.
Strengthening Flexibility
Let’s break down the aspects of flexibility:
1. Adaptability to Change
Being adaptable helps you handle new circumstances with comfort and effectiveness. That infamous “approach anxiety” in dating, for example, lessens once you stop fixating on irrational mental hurdles. The false expectations fall away, and dealing with change gets easier.
2. Openness to New Ideas
You become more receptive to different perspectives and approaches. Flexibility involves not being overly strict with how things must be or shutting down new possibilities when others make mistakes.
3. Increased Creativity
Being flexible allows you to try new things, experiment, and find innovative solutions. My own live streams are a kind of 30-day challenge for me to hone my communication skills.
4. Reduced Frustration
Rigid expectations lead to disappointment. Accepting what is and adapting to new realities—like how dating norms change with technology—reduces your frustration when you realize things won’t always be as they were in the past.
5. Improved Problem Solving
Flexibility means you can apply different strategies according to the situation, making it easier to navigate challenges.
6. Stronger Relationships
Understanding and accommodating others’ needs deepens your connections. Relationships should be balanced; consider your partner’s desires and feelings, not just your own.
7. Greater Resilience
The ability to roll with unexpected events, recover from setbacks, and grow from negative experiences is invaluable, especially in the context of relationships.
8. Enhanced Learning
Open-mindedness allows you to acquire new skills, learn from feedback, and apply personal growth across all areas of your life.
9. Increased Opportunities
Self-improvement reveals opportunities previously unseen. As your confidence and self-image grow, the world responds, and doors start to open.
10. A More Peaceful Existence
Letting go of rigid expectations fosters inner harmony. Not everything will work out perfectly, and that’s okay. Take what comes, and keep moving forward.
Community Invitation
I look forward to interacting with you and building a community where we can share experiences and ideas. We all approach personal growth from different directions, and when those perspectives meet, everyone benefits. I’m eager to learn from you just as much as I hope you’ll learn from me.
True Self-Expression
Living in alignment with your values and beliefs brings increased authenticity. When you establish who you are, people will come to expect that from you, and you attract those who resonate with your energy.
This has a profound effect on relationships, especially romantic ones. Rather than settling for whoever shows up, you can become the kind of person who attracts and connects with compatible partners. Growth is about removing baggage and revealing your best qualities; that’s when you begin to attract what you truly want.
Cultivating Creativity and Self-Confidence
True self-expression also boosts creativity. You’ll feel free to share your unique perspectives and talents without concern for others’ judgments. As you grow into your new, more confident self, it becomes easier to express what you feel, want, and believe.
With honesty and tact, you’ll see that most fears about negative outcomes are unfounded. Communication becomes clear, effective, and sincere.
Reducing Tension and Finding Fulfillment
By reducing the tension between your inner and outer selves, you no longer need to pretend. If someone disagrees with you, it’s just part of life—you become resilient and emotionally intelligent enough to navigate these situations calmly.
Living authentically leads to greater joy and fulfillment. When you act in alignment with your true self, you naturally attract positive experiences and people who appreciate your authenticity.
Mastering Communication and Courage
Improved communication is a natural result of self-expression. As you grow, you’ll be able to express your needs and feelings more clearly without worrying about being misunderstood or rejected. Learning to be tactful is essential: if someone doesn’t react well, use it as a learning opportunity for future interactions.
It takes courage to be yourself, especially in a world where conformity is often rewarded. However, we live in an open-minded era where there’s room for diverse opinions and personalities. The more you own your ideas and present them confidently, the more others will respect you.
Building Self-Awareness and Pursuing Meaningful Goals
All of this begins with self-awareness. Take time to look inward, reflect on your goals, and determine what you want from life. Consider both the experiences that have hurt you and what hasn’t worked in the past, then commit to moving forward in a better direction. Once you know where you are and where you want to go, progress becomes much more straightforward.
Integrating Flexibility and Self-Expression
As you develop flexibility and authentic self-expression, every step builds on the last. The journey is cumulative. Each positive result motivates you to keep moving forward and soon you’ll be amazed at how much your life can improve.
If you’d like to join me on this journey, I encourage you to leave a comment, watch the previous live streams, or share these discussions with others who might benefit. Your participation is what will make this community thrive.
Conclusion: Clarity, Growth, and the Next Steps
Ultimately, a clearer understanding of yourself brings clarity and direction to your life. Expressing yourself confidently, flexibly, and authentically sets you on the right path for exponential personal growth.
Next time, we’ll explore moral courage, optimism, and how they can help you continue to develop your inner game. No matter where you are on your journey, remember: even tiny steps toward improvement will accumulate until you notice a real, positive change in your life.
Thank you for joining me tonight. If you enjoy these live streams, please comment, like, and subscribe to stay updated. Keep striving, and take it easy!
Hi, this is Michael from the Easy Path Project. Tonight, we’re going to be talking about one powerful question: What if understanding people could change your life overnight? We’re going to dive right in and get into the heart of it.
The focus of tonight’s talk is empathy, specifically as part of the nine components of the “inner game” that you may want to improve. Last night, we hit parts one and two, and got cut off during part three—empathy. So, that’s where we’ll pick up.
The Role of Empathy
Empathy allows us to see life from another person’s perspective, strengthen trust, and deepen bonds. When you put yourself in someone else’s shoes, it makes a big difference in understanding where they’re coming from. Often, especially as young men, we enter situations thinking only about what we want, what we’ll get, or what we might lose. That kind of self-focus can hold us back.
Meeting someone halfway means weighing your needs with theirs. Once you start considering the other person’s point of view, everything about your interaction changes—how you act, how you communicate, and how they respond to you.
Empathy is a cornerstone of developing strong inner game.
Emotional Regulation and Meditation
Emotional regulation means keeping your reactions balanced, which improves not just relationships but workplace interactions. I’ve mentioned that meditation doesn’t have to involve sitting with some lofty goal. It can simply be pulling back and observing your thoughts as they come and go, staying detached and not reacting impulsively. Whether you’re hotheaded or prone to self-criticism, reacting emotionally is almost never helpful. Instead, try to step back, see what’s happening, and respond logically and practically to get the best result.
That detachment helps you understand yourself better and interact with others more effectively.
Building Resilience
Resilience makes setbacks temporary, turning failures into stepping stones for success. When things don’t go your way—if you get rejected or make a mistake—it’s much better to see it as a learning experience. We’re all learning as we go; no one is born omniscient. Sometimes you learn best from bad results.
In sports, a champion is the one who gets up after being knocked down. Think of your life as the hero’s journey: setbacks aren’t permanent. Every day brings a new opportunity to reverse your situation and achieve what you want. Your redemption arc is always possible, no matter where you are right now.
Live Streams and the Easy Path Project
I host these live streams each weeknight around 7:30 p.m., sharing insights to help you feel better about your situation and who you are. Each session is added to a playlist you can return to anytime.
Applying Empathy: Better Connections & Communication
Deeper connections come when you can understand and share the feelings of others. Empathy helps you anticipate where people are heading and prepare for situations before they become problems. Being present—living in the now—resolves many issues, but empathy lets you find the rhythm of a conversation or relationship.
Improved communication starts with being a better listener and paying attention to nonverbal cues. If you’ve struggled to keep conversations going, simply ask questions, listen closely to answers, and ask follow-ups. People are naturally self-centered; understanding that helps you keep dialogues flowing smoothly.
I used to talk at people and found that conversations went nowhere. Working on my communication skills, I learned to elicit conversation and ensure everyone could share their thoughts and feelings. This makes relationships stronger.
Nonverbal cues, such as body language, communicate much more than words. For guys who struggle socially or with women, noticing body language—like posture or eye contact—makes a huge difference. If you want to practice, do so in a low-stakes environment like a nearby town. There’s no risk, and you can build confidence. Observe how people interact, and try out new behaviors without fear of repercussions.
Conflict Resolution and Teamwork
Empathy also gives you stronger conflict resolution skills. Seeing multiple perspectives allows you to work through disagreements and find solutions that work for everyone. Cooperation, not confrontation, is the goal.
Increased compassion is an outgrowth of empathy. I used to move through life without considering other people’s perspectives, but learning to understand others made interactions smoother and more enjoyable.
Being a good teammate at work or in relationships also comes from asking people what they want and collaborating. This approach works everywhere—professional settings, friendships, or when dating.
More Meaningful Relationships
When you consider others’ needs and wants, your most important relationships become more supportive and honest. Radical honesty, as Dr. Brad Blanton writes, means not hiding the truth to avoid hurt feelings, leading to better understanding and smoother communication.
Reducing Prejudice & Gaining Social Awareness
Empathy reduces prejudice and judgment, making you more open-minded. We all want to be seen for who we are inside, not just judged by externals. Extend that same perspective to others, and you’ll find greater acceptance and understanding.
A strong inner game leads to better social awareness. By improving your confidence, empathy, and self-regulation, you’ll be more skillful in navigating social dynamics and building satisfying relationships.
Forgiveness and Community
Understanding others’ perspectives makes forgiveness easier. Don’t hold onto resentment over someone just being who they are, whether that’s a woman behaving naturally or an old friend repeating mistakes. Let things go and focus on positive, forward movement.
All this creates a stronger sense of community, where you feel more connected and invested in the well-being of others.
Better coping skills mean reduced anxiety and stress. As you develop your inner game, you’ll find new strategies for handling challenges, recovering from setbacks more quickly, and regulating your emotions in a healthy way.
Improved emotional regulation and problem-solving follow naturally from this. You become more resourceful and approach each obstacle calmly.
When you communicate, empathize, and prepare, things run more smoothly. You stop being caught off guard and start handling situations proactively.
Physical and Mental Benefits
Managing stress improves your physical health, sleep quality, and builds a greater sense of control over your life. When you forgive yourself for past mistakes and let go of regrets, you free yourself to move forward. Small changes—like grooming or dressing well—boost confidence and reinforce positive habits.
Achieving Inner Peace
As you put these pieces together, you experience greater calm and stability. Don’t put excessive value on setbacks or challenges. Staying steady and focused, you’ll move through life with ease and warmth—a sense of comfort that grows as you practice these habits.
Final Thoughts: Building Together
The goal is for all of us to work together and get better. I hope these live streams become a real community, a space where men support each other’s personal development and growth. Share your thoughts, questions, or the challenges you’re facing—dating, social anxiety, confidence issues, or anything else—and we’ll work through them together.
Please leave a comment, let me know what topics you want to hear about, and subscribe if you find value in these sessions. I’ll be here every weeknight at 7:30 p.m. Central, ready to help you grow your inner game and become the strongest, most authentic version of yourself.
I’ve made some bold statements over the past week about how if you do these things, your life will get better. Not “should,” not “might,” not “could” – but will. Tonight, I want to show you exactly why I’m so confident about this.
We’re now three series deep in part ones because I keep trying to narrow this down to something very simple and easy to understand. What I’m sharing tonight are nine key ideas that encompass what inner game truly is, along with concrete examples of the results you can expect.
The Foundation: Belief in Self-Worth
Greater Confidence
Once you start believing in your self-worth, you’ll approach challenges and opportunities with a stronger sense of your ability to succeed. You become more confident naturally, and this confidence grows as you accumulate experiences – whether you succeed or fail.
Healthier Relationships
You’ll be less likely to settle for less than you deserve and more likely to form equitable connections. Too many people talk about why others should “settle” for them. Instead of asking someone to settle, why not become the kind of person where no one has to settle at all?
When you establish what kind of relationship you want and move through life with that framework, everything else falls into place naturally.
Increased Resilience
Setbacks become learning opportunities rather than reflections of your inherent value. Just like in business where you “fire fast” because it’s not personal – it’s just not a good fit. The same applies to relationships and social interactions.
If someone rejects you or ends a relationship, it doesn’t define your worth. There could be countless reasons why, and internalizing it serves no purpose. Learn from it, drop it, and move on.
Willingness to Take Risks
Fear of failure diminishes because your self-worth isn’t tied to outcomes. Whether an approach works out or not doesn’t make you a winner or loser – you’re the same person either way. It’s just their opinion of you.
Improved Self-Care
You’ll prioritize your well-being because you believe you’re worthy of care. Something as simple as dressing well can transform how people respond to you. I once worked with someone who was very lackadaisical in his dress. Just getting him clean clothes and a stylish hat made a dramatic difference.
Here’s the magic: when you feel good about yourself, you want to look good. When you look good, you feel good about yourself. It’s self-reinforcing.
You’ll feel more empowered to say no and protect your time and energy. You don’t have to be stern or hardcore about it, but when you let people know where you stand – gently but firmly – they treat you differently.
Reduced People-Pleasing
Your actions become driven by your own values rather than seeking external validation. You stop thinking you have to earn attention or affection. Instead, you give because you’re a giving person, not because you’re hoping to get something back.
This was a lesson I learned the hard way – sometimes people receive value just from giving to you. Learning to be a graceful receiver is just as important as being a generous giver.
Embracing Your Authentic Self
Greater Authenticity
You’ll feel more comfortable being yourself without fear of judgment. You own who you are. Even if people pick on you, tease you, or ignore you, it doesn’t shake your foundation.
When you’re your authentic self, people will see you, know you, and feel you. They respond better because you’re not hiding behind a facade.
Enhanced Creativity
You’ll be less inhibited by self-doubt and more open to expressing your unique ideas. You won’t be afraid to be vulnerable – there’s a fine line between being weak and being honest and open.
Each person brings something unique to interactions. Your mission, especially with women, is often to help make their lives more interesting. If you’re coming up with the same boring approaches as everyone else, that’s tiresome.
Increased Joy and Fulfillment
A strong sense of self-worth provides a solid foundation for happiness. When you’re not constantly worried about external considerations, you can actually enjoy yourself because you know who you are, what you believe in, and you trust yourself.
The Power of Positive Self-Image
Greater Comfort in Social Situations
You’ll be less self-conscious and more present in interactions. One reason guys struggle with conversations is they’re always thinking about what to say next to seem witty or smart, instead of actually listening.
With a positive self-image, you’re less self-conscious and more present in the moment, dealing with what’s actually happening.
Enhanced Presentation
You’ll carry yourself with more poise and confidence. Think about an athlete who just won a championship – there’s a difference between normal everyday posture and “I’m the champion” posture.
Reduced Self-Criticism
You’ll be kinder and more compassionate toward yourself. Negative self-talk is cumulative – it beats you up and holds you down. Just stopping the self-criticism naturally helps you feel better about yourself.
Better Mental Health
A positive self-image contributes to lower levels of anxiety and depression. It prevents the downward spiral where you’re not looking good, not feeling good about yourself, and getting stuck in the dumps.
Greater Openness to New Experiences
You’ll be less held back by fear of how you’ll be perceived. When you feel confident, you’re more likely to try new things, be in new situations, and meet new people.
Self-Acceptance and Moving Forward
Increased Self-Acceptance
You’ll embrace your imperfections as part of what makes you unique. We’re all human with strengths, weaknesses, and imperfections.
Here’s something interesting: when you’re talking with someone, they might be just as worried about how you perceive them as you are about how they perceive you. They’re not necessarily sitting there judging everything you do harshly.
This is why face-to-face interactions are so much better than dating apps. In person, people take in the totality of who you are – your presence, demeanor, body language, and how you influence the communication. You’re missing all of that with apps.
The Easy Path Forward
Mastery of your inner game transcends temporary tricks and techniques, leading to a more meaningful and rewarding journey through life. Everything in your life – dating, relationships, public interactions – is affected by your inner game.
Many people have a diminished sense of self for various reasons. The idea here is to unwind that tightness, get down to who you really are, and start rebuilding from that authentic foundation.
The person you’ve always wanted to be is already inside you. You just need to let them free.
Join us each night at 7:30 PM Central for live stream shows, where we’ll explore coping skills, flexibility, and true self-expression. Make sure to subscribe and hit the notification bell so you don’t miss our live conversations!
Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central!
Watch replays in the live stream playlist!
The Easy Path Project Live Stream #17
Designing Your Life With Intention
Welcome back to the Easy Path Project live stream. I’m Michael, your host, and tonight I want to discuss something a little different. As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a fan of “woo”—the mystical, the magical—but I aim to use these ideas pragmatically. I’m not here to perform magic tricks, but rather to find practical ways to apply these concepts to real life.
Tonight marks the first entry in our Explore Series. If you’ve listened to me recently, you’ve heard me talk about life as a simulator—a kind of simulation where you can set up experiences to practice and learn. Imagine you travel to another town and interact with people you’ll never see again. That becomes a practice run, a simulation with no lasting ramifications.
We’re carrying that idea further tonight. Here’s the key question: What happens when you trust yourself and reality completely? Instead of explaining everything up front, I’ll guide you through the discussion, and you’ll start to see what I mean.
Life as an Interactive Video Game
Picture life as an interactive video game you’re designing in real time. There are many similarities between video games and life. In games, you start out learning basic lessons at easier levels. As you gain experience and grow, the challenges become greater. Sometimes life can even feel overwhelming.
The idea I want to convey is this: your internal narrative—what you tell yourself—directly shapes your external experience. If you’re struggling with past mistakes or misunderstood lessons, those internal stories can cause ongoing issues. But by changing your inner narrative to be more positive and open, you’ll notice that your external world reflects that improvement.
Your emotions serve as a navigational system for personal growth. If you can step back and recognize your emotions before reacting impulsively, you’ll realize they’re signals from the universe. Whether it’s anxiety, anger, or confusion, try to notice what your emotions are telling you and respond thoughtfully. This skill helps you navigate life more gracefully. We’ve all experienced moments where a snap reaction caused lasting problems—undoing that damage is tough. By learning from your emotions rather than being driven by them, you can avoid many pitfalls.
Exploring Subjective Reality
I first encountered the concept of living as if reality is a simulation about a decade ago from Steve Pavlina, a personal development speaker and educator. He recorded a podcast called “The True Nature of Reality,” centered on subjective reality. It’s a deep topic—I recently completed a 60-lesson course on it! But for tonight, we’re just going to touch on the basics, offering a taste of how subjective reality can be applied practically and sensibly.
This ties into our earlier discussions on manifestation. While some present manifestation as purely mystical, I like to focus on its practical aspects—how to prepare yourself to receive the things you want.
Join the Conversation
A quick reminder: these streams are live every weeknight, Monday through Friday, starting around 7:30 PM. If you enjoy this format, you’re always invited to join, share your thoughts, or bring up topics you’d like to explore together. If you’re new, I also have a playlist of previous streams you can catch up on. I truly believe that if you start applying the principles we discuss here, your life will improve—guaranteed. This is the Easy Path Project, after all.
Stepping Into the Simulation
Sculpt Your Desired Character
Let’s get practical. The first step is sculpting your desired character. Think of this as designing your avatar in a video game. What qualities do you want? Make a detailed list—don’t be shy! You’re defining yourself. Remember, you were perfect the day you were born. Personal development isn’t about fixing a broken you, but about shedding the baggage you’ve accumulated and returning to your best self.
Building Trust With Reality
Next is building trust with reality. Imagine the simulation is designed to suit you. Give reality the benefit of the doubt. Think of how video games start easily and only get challenging as your skills grow. Even in difficult levels, victory is always possible. Likewise, assume your real-life simulation is set up so everything you need will be available when you need it. Let go of skepticism and pessimism; those attitudes aren’t helpful. Instead, be open to the possibility that positive outcomes are within your reach.
Social Alignment and Connections
Another key principle is social alignment: attracting and connecting with people who fit your desired character and journey. Just as in games, where non-playable characters (NPCs) help move the story along, real life offers countless opportunities to find and connect with those who will support your growth. As you become more authentic, the right people will naturally be drawn to you.
Interpreting Emotional Feedback
Learn to view your emotions as signals or feedback from the simulation itself. Emotions guide you towards alignment and indicate when you might be off track. Consider old adventure games where a blinking light signals which direction to go. In the simulation of life, your emotions serve a similar purpose: they nudge you back towards your center. If you trust reality to guide you, you’ll find yourself moving continually closer to alignment.
Communicating Desires to Reality
Be intentional about communicating your desires. Know what you want—whether it’s more confidence, a loving relationship, or a sense of adventure. Let the simulation know your preferences. This doesn’t mean demanding outcomes, but being clear and specific about your intentions. Effective communication—both with others and with reality itself—takes practice, but it’s essential for attracting the experiences, relationships, and growth you desire.
Creating an Interesting Story
Think about crafting an engaging narrative for your life. Don’t focus on outcomes alone; consider the importance of the story you’re co-creating. Imagine someone watching your journey. Would it entertain and inspire them? Sometimes the journey is more meaningful than the destination. Like in classic hero stories, setbacks and challenges can make your story all the richer.
Owning Your Story: Overcoming Shame and Guilt
Everyone has a past. Some aspects may feel shameful, but the way forward isn’t hiding them—it’s owning your story. Reality already knows your truth; accept ownership, make amends where possible, and move on. Integrating, rather than concealing, your whole self leads to more authentic alignment and growth.
Embracing Playfulness
Bring playfulness, lightness, and fun into your interactions with reality and other people. Playfulness strengthens relationships, boosts resilience, and makes your story more enjoyable—for you and everyone around you. Given the choice, people gravitate toward those who lighten the mood. Cultivate that quality in yourself.
Aligning With Your Path With Heart
Finally, make choices based on what feels energizing, aligned, and meaningful—not just what brings security or material gain. Moral courage means standing up for what you believe in, even when it’s hard.
When you make decisions that resonate with your deepest values, you naturally become more confident and at ease. Chasing only external rewards is unfulfilling and ultimately boring. Choose a life that reflects your true self and the people you want to be around.
Wrapping Up
Are you finding value in these ideas? Living as if you’re in a simulation might sound odd, but each principle offers a practical way to shift your approach to life. Give reality the benefit of the doubt, express your desires clearly, listen to emotional feedback, and adopt a playful, light-hearted attitude. When you begin viewing life as a co-creative process—or a well-designed simulation—you’ll notice real, tangible improvements.
Implementing these principles transforms random experiences into purposeful growth. Instead of drifting through life, you’ll start guiding yourself toward your goals with intention and clarity. By letting go of unhelpful baggage and living aligned with your values, you’ll move forward more easily and confidently.
Tomorrow is White Knight Wednesday, where we’ll discuss women’s perspectives and relationships—if that’s of interest, I hope to see you there.
Remember to share this with anyone who could benefit. Community and support make everyone stronger. I look forward to our next conversation—take it easy!
Join me every weeknight at around 7:30pm Central for more live streams, or catch up with the replay playlist.
The ideas we discuss are straightforward, but the more you hear them, the easier it becomes to apply them.
Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central!
Watch replays in the live stream playlist!
The Easy Path Project Live Stream #13
It’s Not About You: The Truth About Why Attraction Doesn’t Guarantee Anything
Welcome to the Easy Path Project live stream! I’m Michael, your host, and tonight marks our inaugural “White Night Wednesday” – a perspective shift where we approach dating from the woman’s point of view.
Sometimes guys think women are these crazy, wild, foreign creatures. I’m going to give you some perspective about how women think and show you that everything about dating, relationships, or getting a girl doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with you at all.
Obviously, you do have something to do with it, but there’s the possibility that a girl will totally be into you – she digs you, you don’t have to win her over, you’ve already accomplished that part – but she still, regardless of her attraction for you, turns you down, says no, or just rejects you.
Tonight’s Topic: Why Women Say No (And It Has Nothing to Do with Your Worth)
Could understanding the real reasons behind women’s dating decisions eliminate the confidence damage that comes from perceived rejection? I think that’s a really big problem young guys have. If you’re even the slightest bit shy, introverted, or have any confidence issues, and then you listen to some of these gurus who say “just approach and that’ll solve all your problems” – it’s like no. You go up unprepared without your full confidence going, get shot down, and then for the next year you lick your wounds thinking “nobody likes me.”
That’s not really the case. Sometimes things just happen. When we start talking about resilience and true inner strength, these things won’t stick with you anymore. You’ll brush them aside and hang onto them as educational experiences, but you won’t attach any value to the rejection itself.
The Real Reasons Women Might Reject You (That Have Nothing to Do with You)
Let me share some invisible factors that influence women’s dating choices that most men never recognize:
1. Career Goals and Major Life Transitions
I know a woman who’s 40 years old and has finally decided she’s going to get a guy and settle down. She’s been a very active dater from high school until now – that’s 20 years of concentrating on herself and her career goals. I’m certain that during that span, she was with several men who were perfectly suitable, but she passed because her career goals mattered more than any particular gentleman at that time.
2. Recently Ended Relationships
Sometimes girls do ridiculous things when they end relationships – they try to make the guy jealous or act out. Hopefully, after getting over being angry or upset, they take time to understand what didn’t work and why. If you’re there during that figuring-out period, it has nothing to do with you. She’s trying to process what happened last time.
3. Family Responsibilities or Personal Challenges
I know a girl whose father tried to move to a different country, didn’t do well financially, and had all kinds of problems. She was handling her own business while dealing with a parent in a foreign country having difficulties. She couldn’t concentrate on dating or relationships because family and personal stuff comes first.
4. Planning to Move or Travel Long Term
I’ve been in this situation myself. When I was younger and traveled a lot, regardless of how I felt about a girl, it wasn’t going to happen because I was a rambling man moving on. If she’s got a job offer somewhere or wants to see France, those opportunities are only available for certain periods of your life. If you happen to be on the opposite side of a life-changing decision, sorry – it wasn’t you.
5. Different Long-Term Relationship Goals
This is usually framed as men only thinking about sex while women have a drastically different timetable. Women are trying to compress a bunch of life goals into about a 20-year window. If you don’t respect that window, things go poorly. She might be ready to settle down and have kids while you’re thinking Netflix and chill, or vice versa – she might want casual while you want something serious.
6. Incompatible Life Plans or Timelines
Her career might be very important, she might need to have children, you might be in school, or have a job with conflicting schedules. There could be a million ways things don’t work out based on timing and where you are in your respective lives.
7. Significant Age Differences
If you’re an older guy with a younger girl thinking it’s just for fun, but she should be looking for a relationship partner to start a family, you have to consider the moral implications. I spent time in another country where children are probably more important than life itself. For a young woman to get to 27, 28, 29 without a kid is unacceptable culturally.
You really do have to communicate about these things, which brings up one of our nine pillars of inner game: moral courage – having the ability to stand up for your morals even when it’s detrimental to you.
8. Different Values Regarding Family, Religion, or Lifestyle
If you’re not the same religion, or your families are feuding like the Hatfields and McCoys or Romeo and Juliet, there might be reasons beyond you. Blood is thicker than water.
9. Long-Distance Seems Unworkable
Even in small towns, travel is getting difficult. If I wanted to date a girl on the opposite side of town, we’re talking about two hours of travel in both directions. If that distance is difficult to navigate, unless you’re the most amazing man ever, she might choose a different path.
10. Workplace Complications
I remember working at a car dealership and chatting up a cute receptionist at the Lexus dealer. When I asked her for coffee, before I got back to my office, I had a blinking light on my phone about intra-company dating policies. Whether she liked me or not, I was off-limits due to workplace considerations.
Additional Factors to Consider
Past Relationship Patterns She Wants to Break
Maybe she’s dated a lot of military guys and wants to break that pattern. If you’re military and she shoots you down despite thinking you’re funny, it’s not you – it’s the pattern she’s trying to change.
Family or Cultural Expectations
I’ve seen this with Indian friends who have pressure to marry within their ethnicity, or Japanese students who stick together in their community.
Emotional Unavailability or Fear of Commitment
People are afraid for various reasons. You have to be vulnerable in relationships, and that puts you at a disadvantage if the other person isn’t caring or compassionate.
Financial Instability
I knew a guy whose friends-with-benefits situation existed because she had enormous student loan debt. Taking on that financial responsibility was a deal breaker for a serious relationship.
Existing Friendship She Doesn’t Want to Risk
Sometimes she’d rather maintain the friendship than risk losing it by dating.
Different Social Circles
If your social circles don’t mesh well, or she has to choose between a possible relationship with you versus a current relationship with someone in her circle, you might be the odd man out.
Lifestyle Differences
You could be a gamer while she’s a social butterfly who likes clubs, or vice versa. Sometimes the growth needed to overcome these differences is too much.
Unequal Ability to Invest Time and Effort
If someone sends you their Google calendar with windows like “I could see you from 4 to 5 or 7 to 9,” they’re clearly prioritizing other things over the relationship.
Mutual Friends Advising Against It
Women seem to value their friends’ opinions more than men do. Even if she’s totally into you at a club, if her friends are pulling her away for whatever reason, she probably won’t fight them to stay.
Intuition
Sometimes they just have a feeling that the timing or situation isn’t right. You might be a groovy cat, but if she doesn’t feel it or feels it’s not correct, there’s not much you can do.
The New Paradigm
Here’s the key insight: recognizing that her decision reflects her circumstances rather than your flaws preserves your confidence and prevents unnecessary self-doubt spirals.
Don’t spend the next year beating yourself up thinking “nobody likes me.” Instead, realize that life plus the girl moving on from you equals an opportunity to move on to the next possibility. If you have a growth mindset instead of a scarcity mindset, knowing there are four billion women out there, once you decide to be the cool guy you are and display it, this won’t be an issue anymore.
Think of rejection as a learning opportunity and move on. It’s not you.
Moving Forward
She’s actually done you a favor by taking herself out of consideration. It gives you the opportunity to find a better fit, and that’s what this is all about.
The best way to keep it from being about you is to ditch all the crap keeping you from being the awesome guy you want to be and prepare yourself for that awesome girl when she comes along. Maybe if you’re truly awesome – if you push her buttons, make her synapses fire, give her the feels – she might overlook some of these other considerations and put things in your favor.
Remember: it’s about building resilience. When uncomfortable or unfortunate situations occur, yeah it sucks and you wish it wasn’t so, but it is, so you deal with it. That’s the resilience part of the inner game we’re developing.
This is the Easy Path Project – maximum life, minimum struggle. We’re trying to get through this as best we can, make the most out of it, but not work our asses off. Just take it easy and slide into the cool stuff.
Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central!
Join the TEPP Livestream M-F around 7:30pm Central!
Watch replays in the live stream playlist!
The Easy Path Project Live Stream #16
Why Insecure People Struggle in Relationships – A Live Discussion
Welcome, everyone! Tonight, I want to delve into a topic I know resonates with many: why do insecure people struggle with relationships? Based on conversations we’ve had over the past week, some of you might already guess my perspective – insecurity stems from unprocessed issues from the past, or current challenges that haven’t been properly addressed. When these linger, it becomes difficult to interact with others in a healthy, fulfilling way.
Questions to Uncover Your Insecurity
Tonight, I’ve prepared a selection of questions to help you reflect on your own insecurities and how they may impact your relationships. These questions are designed to address why insecurity can make it hard not only to sustain a relationship but, for some, even to start one. Everything we talk about is intended to help you not just attract someone, but also maintain and build upon a healthy connection. Once you start, you need to continue growing and applying what you learn.
Confidence, Emotional Intelligence, and Communication
Confidence is crucial in dating. It gives you the courage to approach anyone without fear. Without true confidence, your attempts to appear self-assured will usually come across as inauthentic, and people can sense that quickly.
Emotional intelligence is just as important—it’s what enhances communication, prevents misunderstandings, and allows for deeper empathy. Originally, I considered “empathy” as one of my nine pillars of inner game, inspired by Jay Abraham’s nine pillars for business growth, but I realized emotional intelligence covers a wider range.
Self-awareness is another major component. It clarifies compatibility, preventing you from settling for less than you deserve. Many people who struggle with insecurity also struggle to recognize abundance in life. If you have a growth and abundance mindset, you see opportunities everywhere.
Scarcity mindset, on the other hand, makes you cling to the first person who shows interest, even if they’re not right for you. As you strengthen your inner game, you learn you can be selective and not settle out of fear or lack of options.
Mindset Shift: From Scarcity to Abundance
One story that comes to mind: a friend from high school married the first girl he dated. I hope it worked out for him, but it also shows how scarcity mindset can limit your perspective. If she hadn’t been the right person, he would have been stuck. As you grow, you’ll realize you don’t have to settle for the first person who gives you attention. When you know what kind of partner and life you desire, you can make choices that align with your standards and long-term happiness—especially if you’re seeking a meaningful, lasting relationship.
The Structure of the Series
This session is part of my ongoing “Easy Path Project” live stream series, where we explore these topics in depth. We have live streams every weeknight around 7:30 p.m. Central. Sometimes technical glitches happen, but we always make it happen on our schedule! You can catch live shows, replays on YouTube, or even read the transcript on my blog.
Now, let’s jump into some real questions about dating and inner game. These are common areas of concern for many, and tonight I’ll walk through my thoughts and advice on each.
Dating and Inner Game: Q&A
How Do I Approach Someone I’m Attracted To Without Feeling Nervous?
Approaching someone can trigger anxiety and self-doubt, especially if you place a lot of importance on the outcome. Often, anxiety comes from thinking, “This moment needs to go perfectly,” which only raises the pressure. One technique I recommend is treating interactions as practice—detach from the result. Go to a different town, enter several stores, and just practice looking clerks in the eye and saying something small as you buy a pack of gum. No one remembers these encounters, but you benefit from the repetition.
By practicing in low-pressure situations, you start seeing that these interactions don’t define you. A strong inner game boosts self-confidence, which makes it easier to approach others without fear. It’s about building self-worth—you know you have value, so you can interact freely and without neediness. Optimism also helps; instead of assuming the worst, be open to the possibility that things might turn out well.
How Should I Handle Rejection Gracefully?
Don’t assign excessive value to getting rejected. It is not a personal attack—sometimes it’s just not the right fit. There are countless reasons why a connection might not happen. View each experience as data: review the situation, see what could have gone better, and remember that some things are simply out of your control. Resilience lets you interpret rejection as feedback, not failure. It helps you move on quickly, better equipped for the next interaction.
How Can I Be Authentic Instead of Just Trying to Impress?
Some people tell me, “I’m being myself, but it never works!” The problem often isn’t being yourself, but trying to appear as something you’re not. If you put on a flashy facade, you’ll have to maintain it, and eventually people see through it. Instead, identify what’s holding you back from being your true self. Let go of old baggage and work on becoming the person you want to be. Stand up for your values, express yourself honestly, and develop emotional intelligence. Authenticity leads to deeper, more honest connections.
How Do I Avoid Being Needy or Clingy?
Neediness is a major turn-off in relationships. It stems from scarcity mindset: believing you have to chase or hold on to someone or you’ll miss your only chance. Think of relationships like overlapping circles—you’re both individuals, and the intersection is your partnership. Be self-contained and confident; recognize that your partner’s life is enhanced by being with you, not completed by it. Developing self-sufficiency and emotional stability lets you maintain your independence within the relationship.
How Do I Set Healthy Boundaries Without Feeling Guilty?
If you’re afraid of losing someone or don’t believe new opportunities will come, it’s easy to let others walk over you. While you want to be gentle and kind, you also need moral courage to insist on your boundaries. When you communicate your standards calmly and confidently, you’re more likely to be respected. Not everyone will agree with or accept your boundaries, but that simply means they aren’t the right person for you. Strong self-esteem empowers you to prioritize your own well-being—as well as your partner’s.
How Can I Express My Feelings Honestly?
Once you’re self-confident and understand your value, expressing emotions honestly becomes much easier. You don’t need to wear your heart on your sleeve or overshare, but don’t hide your feelings either. Moderation is key: be open about how you feel at the appropriate time, in the appropriate way. Emotional intelligence helps you know what to express and when. Owning your emotions—honestly and without shame—creates space for genuine connection.
How Can I Handle Jealousy Effectively?
Jealousy arises when you doubt your own self-worth or fear losing someone to another. The best remedy is to stop viewing others as your competition. Focus on being the best version of yourself for your partner, rather than worrying about others. Secure individuals manage jealousy with trust and honest communication. If jealousy persists, it often points to unresolved issues in your confidence or self-image—address those, and jealousy tends to fade.
How Do I Keep My Identity in a Relationship?
It’s easy to lose yourself if you think you have to earn your partner’s love or blend your identity into the relationship. Build a solid foundation of who you are: your values, morals, and understanding of yourself. Self-awareness allows you to remain balanced. The healthiest relationships are between two full individuals who choose to share their lives, not two people who become codependent.
How Do I Overcome the Fear of Being Vulnerable?
Vulnerability feels risky, but it’s essential for true intimacy. If you want more than a surface-level interaction, you have to risk showing your authentic self. Moderation is important—share a little at first, then gradually open up more as trust builds. When you feel secure, vulnerability becomes an act of strength, not weakness. Courage and honesty in expressing yourself lay the foundation for deep, lasting relationships.
Final Thoughts: Authenticity and Growth
Are these ideas resonating with you? Do you recognize yourself in any of these patterns? If you feel you’re not good enough, don’t know what to say, or are held back by the past, know that you’re not alone. All of us pick up limiting beliefs along the way, but you can let go of those and start building your own inner pillars. As you grow, things get easier and connections become more genuine.
Remember: authentic connections will replace exhausting performances designed to impress others. Once you decide to become your true self, you won’t need pickup lines or tricks. You’ll simply feel better about who you are and show up as that person—confident, self-assured, and ready for real connection.
If you found value in this discussion, please leave a comment and let me know your thoughts and questions. Subscribe to join us live every weeknight, or catch the replay on YouTube or my blog. Let’s keep growing together!
Thanks for stopping by tonight. I hope I’ve given you something to think about, and I look forward to seeing you again soon. Take it easy!
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